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You are here: Home / Reader Stories / Afraid of seeing holes

Afraid of seeing holes

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When I was in the tenth grade, I discovered I had trypophobia. I was in anatomy and we were looking at spongy bones and I just remember not even being able to look at the board and take notes that day. I was TRIPPIN. I was freaking out hard that day. Like my heart was beating fast and I felt uneasy in my chest. And that uneasiness feeling stayed with me the entire day. No matter how much I tried to forget it, i couldn’t shake that feeling of discomfort in my chest. I just kept my head down the whole class and I got my friend to send me the notes later that day. So being a medical student is quite adventurous for me. I’ve seen a lot of things that give me anxiety but nothing like holes. I figured that I’d probably get over my fear eventually and I’d get used to seeing it. I’m currently in my third year as a medical student and I still have not gotten used to seeing holes. It’s like I’m seeing it the first time every time. Three years of med school and I’m still not even remotely close to overcoming my fear. Like I’m deathly afraid of holes. There’s gotta be some sorta science behind that. Some explanation for why my brain just can’t seem to process clusters of holes. It’s gotten to the point where I literally begged my doctor to prescribe me hydroxyzine so I’d have some medicine to take whenever my anxiety came back. Thankfully I’m going into psychiatry so I don’t have to look at graphic things often but since that day in tenth grade, there’s a lot of things I can’t look at the same. Like I hate eating goat meat because the bones usually have little holes in them. I hate looking at leopards. honeycombs, etc. A bunch of things that never used to trigger my trypophobia now does. But I haven’t let that stop me yet. I don’t have to see that stuff much more anyway or maybe even at all when I become a psychiatrist.

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